|
|
Friday, October 30th, 2009
|
| Time: | 2:24 am. |
| Music: | Linkin Park. |
|
big drama-rama
SIGH
|
|
Monday, September 21st, 2009
|
|
|
it was a "we were merely freshmen" kind of day.
but like, to the effect of the opposite of what the song really intends.
haha, if that even makes sense.
on the way home, napaluha ako ng Shooting Star na biglang tumugtog sa UR
but not out of sadness--
it was a beautifulest eureka moment: goddammit, I am the shooting star! (we all are!)
how am i?
i'm pretty gosh darn good :D
not quite "great" yet, but yeah. :3
and with this, i guess i make my farewell to LJ official.
i don't know what else to say, but please believe
that there is always good in this world. we have to work to find it,
of course. but it's always there, and please, please try to be that good.
|
|
Sunday, September 6th, 2009
|
|
|
|
please, at the very least, just leave a blank comment
|
|
Saturday, September 5th, 2009
|
|
|
remember losing hope
remember feeling low
remember all the feelings and the day they stopped.
one day, i'll be able to answer how are you? with a no-hesitation, unequivocal great.
|
|
Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009
|
|
|
i'm worried this whole going-back-to-Ateneo thing is all just very Atonement.
sorry for linking to the movie, i haven't read the book
|
|
Tuesday, September 1st, 2009
|
|
|
|
wants to be an academic, but scared i'm not smart enough. hahaha
|
|
Saturday, August 29th, 2009
|
|
|
No one would have believed in the last years of the nineteenth century that this world was being watched keenly and closely by intelligences greater than man's and yet as mortal as his own; that as men busied themselves about their various concerns they were scrutinised and studied, perhaps almost as narrowly as a man with a microscope might scrutinise the transient creatures that swarm and multiply in a drop of water. With infinite complacency men went to and fro over this globe about their little affairs, serene in their assurance of their empire over matter. It is possible that the infusoria under the microscope do the same. No one gave a thought to the older worlds of space as sources of human danger, or thought of them only to dismiss the idea of life upon them as impossible or improbable. It is curious to recall some of the mental habits of those departed days. At most terrestrial men fancied there might be other men upon Mars, perhaps inferior to themselves and ready to welcome a missionary enterprise. Yet across the gulf of space, minds that are to our minds as ours are to those of the beasts that perish, intellects vast and cool and unsympathetic, regarded this earth with envious eyes, and slowly and surely drew their plans against us.
HG Wells published The War of the Worlds in 1898 pala! o:
|
|
Monday, August 24th, 2009
|
|
Monday, August 17th, 2009
|
|
|
Kjwan - Pause
i thought i didn't need you. [i] thought i could rule the world without you by my side. as the world bears down on my shoulders, i find the fear doesn't subside.
where have you been? i've been so alone. i don't know how i've lasted this long.
you said, "the fires won't consume you" and, "in the rivers you won't drown."
i wish to pause this moment [be]cause as i cry i start to realize: what's missing [is] you. i need you. you give me strength. you take away my fear. there [is] a void in my heart that only you could fill.
where have you been? i've been so alone. i don't know how i've lasted this long. you said, "the fires won't consume you" and, "in the rivers you won't drown." i wish to pause this moment [be]cause as i cry i start to realize: what's missing [is] you. you said, "the fires won't consume you." you said, "the fires won't consume you."
i wish to pause this moment [be]cause as i cry i start to realize: what's missing [is] You. I've been shit lately- there's really no other way of saying it. gumuho ang mundo. nasira lahat ng mga larawan. karimlan.
but only in absolute darkness are you able to find the light of hope, as marcel (and eddieboy calasanz) says. you find that something to hold on to with all your self-- that one thing to hope in.
a few months ago i misplaced that hope. but this statement deserves a more thorough explanation. it was not a wrongly-placed hope, an ill-placed hope, nor a falsely-placed hope. it was rightly placed in the sense that it was love. 100%, i still believe that, one hundred percent.
it was, however, misplaced, in the sense that i mistook it as the only one i could hope in. i forgot my faith- faith in the Transcendent.
as things changed and images renewed, my hope didn't. as a result, i couldn't keep up. nawala ang kaisa-isang pinanghahawakan ko. that has resulted in the shit that i am/am in.
==============
what's required is a leap of hope, a leap of faith. diving (yet) deeper into the unknown, to test the light, if you would, and find that singular source that can still manage to creep through.
Kjwan - Lifeline
i hardly ever noticed, i'm lost in love again. but you could always see me and read me. [i'm] trying to find an answer, [i'm] waiting for sign; while you've been standing there.
close your eyes, hold tight, things are gonna be alright.
let it go, let it flow. when you walk, then you will know.
you will always have His truth- it's right inside of you. break out, break out.
[i'm] smashed against the pavement, plastered on the walls, hoping that you'll find me and save me again.
trying to grab a lifeline, waiting for your call-- you were always there.
close your eyes, hold tight, things are gonna be alright.
let it go, let it flow. when you walk, then you will know.
you will always have His truth- it's right inside of you. break out, break out.
close your eyes, hold tight, things are gonna be alright.
let it go, let it flow. when you walk, then you will know.
you will always have His truth- it's right inside of you. break out, break out.
when you walk then you will know. my leap of hope is my intention to teach Theology in Ateneo. it would be unfair if i didn't say it would also be self-serving- to help me once again find that light, after all, some further studies and deepening of faith will be required. but if i take this path, it will be structured by peers i will be among. it's my leap into an unknown, but it's an unknown in which i know i'll be taken care of, because that's what i really need now.
on a more preach-y yet practical level, the world is always in need of love. to teach a deeper, more personal kind of faith, a better understanding of Christianity, a more practical approach to Jesus- i'll admit i can only claim to know so much, but i feel it's a duty to try and spread this, and teaching in ateneo seems to be my best bet.
(the danger is now my placing all my eggs in this basket.)
Kjwan - 13 seconds to love
Sometimes, the world is all over us. finding times that means more than just this. we try [and] escape our lives, nowhere to go, nowhere to go.
we can get through this with some love in us, we can get through this with some love.
just take my hand and we'll walk on through, this crazy path that we're not used to. if i am sleepy, just wake me up, because i need you here beside me. we can get through this with some love in us, we can get through this with some love. we can get through this, so just hold on. hold on, to me.
love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, LOVE.
===========
These three kjwan songs have been forever on loop, spaced only by the other tracks of 13 seconds to love. i keep saying it, but this album is truly saving my life. as ateneo grads i can clearly see the influence of philo and theo on the boys from kjwan and knowing that i can relate on a similar level with the lessons they were taught and seeing them reflected in the songs, it's uplifting in a way i can't describe. a big thank you to marc, jorel, boogie and j-hoon. i consider your album part of my personal Revelation. it's showing me a light and i am [desperately] hoping that i am making the right steps to secure it- for myself, and if things go well, hopefully for others as well.
close your eyes, hold tight, things are gonna be alright.
tbc - to be continued; (to be concluded)
|
|
|